Sasuke's Snow Problem
by Kuro
Summary: complete Uchiha Sasuke has a fear a fear of snow, spawned from an incident involving a bucket, a room full of sheep, Itachi and his father. Now, Sasuke and co. Or at least Sasuke, Sakura and Naruto must find a way to stop the wretched weather!
1. Snow and Hobo Bob!

_Gasp!_ Can it be? Is it she?! Yes! Its another crazy fanfic by the moronic Polar Bear that'll eventually replace all nuclear weapons in Canada with microwaves with tinfoil in them!   
  
Yeah... Sorry it took so long. ^^; I forgot what I was doing (I started this while writing _KatP_) so it took awhile to remember. ^_~   
  
**Disclaimer:** I own the plot. And my hatred for Sasuke. Best not to ask why unless you want a list a mile long (if a mile is about 2 pages). All else belongs to someone greater than I!   
  
~*~*~   
  
**Sasuke's Snow Problem: Chapter One: Snow... and Hobo Bob!**   
  
~*~*~   
  
Uchiha Sasuke: the most _popular_ guy in the school, loved by _all_ girls, and out to kill his brother. He's afraid of nothing and is the number one rookie. _Nobody_ could _ever_ beat _him_!   
  
Until Uzumaki Naruto became his rival.   
  
Although our _fabulous_ Uchiha runt never thought much about Naruto. Who would? Naruto the _outcast_, the _dead last idiot_. Oh the list of things Naruto was could go on forever. Yep, Sasuke was pretty lucky. A rival like him, just made Sasuke look better.   
  
Yep, Sasuke defiantly had it all, the looks, the "I'm-a-deep-and-depressing-angst-muffin-guy-whom-every-girl-loves-but-hates-being-loved attitude", and the stupid rival. Sasuke life couldn't get better. Nope, nope, nope.   
  
That is... until the first time he saw it snow.   
  
Now, Sasuke liked this village because snow only happened once every 10 years. 10 years wasn't a long time, but it gave Sasuke time to recuperate. Sometimes it didn't snow for 100 years. But we won't go there. Anyways, so unfortunately for our dear precious Sasuke this year happened to be a year where it snowed. Now the Uchiha-bunny is normally very friendly with the snow-fall. They love to run and be happy little Uchiha-bunnies during the first snow fall.   
  
Although this Uchiha-bunny hates it. I won't go into details quite yet, but it has to do with Itachi, his dad, a bucket and a room full of sheep. Anyways, as I was saying; this Uchiha-bunny got unlucky because it was the year it was to snow.   
  
Now, at this exact moment, Kakashi is running around making a complete and utter fool of himself, running around town trying to be Doctor Seuss. Sasuke _should_ have been waiting with Sakura and Naruto... but he decided to go a few hours later.   
  
But this is completely irrelevant to _this_ story. This story is telling you where Sakura, Sasuke, and Naruto were while Kakashi was with TenTen, Kurenai, Asuma, and Neji.... and Gai... _Stupid Gai_... Oh, and why Sasuke is afraid of snow.   
  
**This is his story.**   
  
Not that you needed tell or anything... ANYWAYS!   
  
At this very moment Sasuke was just about to get up, deciding it was finally time for the Uchiha-bunny to emerge and make his existence even more known in the world. I would go into detail about how he got dressed, spilt juice in his hair etcetera, etcetera, but that's just lame and takes too much time. Now, where were we? Oh yes, Sasuke walked calmly out his front door, as per usual in the morning. It was bright, sunny, and somewhat cold. A usual day if you will. UNTIL THE PLOT BUNNIES ATTACKED!! THEY WERE HERE! THEY WERE THERE!! THEY WERE EVERYWHERE!!   
  
Oh wait... wrong... um... please ignore that.   
  
"I think... I'll train by myself today, stupid Naruto and Sakura. I don't need them. Plus Sakura's name is too close to mine... suspiciously close..." Sasuke rubbed his chin in thought. It was suspiciously close... Their parents must have planned this! "IT'S A CONSPIRACY!" Sasuke yelled in horror. A couple of villagers stopped to stare at the Uchiha-bunny. Sasuke coughed. "Erm... too much sugar..." he said uncomfortably. The villagers shrugged and continued with their lives. Itachi was just as weird anyways...   
  
"Did you hear?" a random villager said to another as Uchiha-bunny... I mean Sasuke passed them. "They forecasted snow for next week."   
  
"That's stupid," the other villager said. "I heard Tsunade-sama took Kakashi-sama's books! He'll be on a rampage!"   
  
"We'd better lock out children inside," the first villager agreed. Sasuke was now panicking. Snow? Why now? What not after he's dead?! He groaned. Today was not shaping up to be his day. Especially since it seemed that he still had juice is his hair. Oh well, why should he believe the weather man.   
  
"Yeah! When has the weather man been right?" Sasuke asked himself loudly.... very loudly.   
  
"Yeesh kid! Would you shut up?! Some of us are still trying to sleep!" some random hobo on Sasuke front lawn said.   
  
"Oh, sorry Bob," Sasuke said.   
  
"Whatever, stupid ninjas," Bob shook his head. Sasuke continued on his way, slowly getting back into his usual 'I'm an AVENGER' mode. Actually that would make a good bumper sticker... ANYWAYS! Sasuke stuffed snow in the back of his mind... well... the thought of snow, now would you stop making me so literal? I mean seriously—oh, oh, sorry, off topic. Anyways, Sasuke reached his destination of "that training place" and... began to... train... and stuff.   
  
That's when he noticed...   
  
It was getting colder...   
  
"GASP!!" said Sasuke.   
  
"GASP!!" says the reader!   
  
"GASP!!" says Itachi.   
  
"What the...?" says Kisame. 'Course these two are doing something completely unrelated to _this_ story thus causing me to wonder why the hell I just wrote that. BUT NO TIME FOR SCIENCE CLASS!!   
  
"So the weather man was RIGHT?!? Oh how cruel, why me? Why me? Wait!" Sasuke said dramatically. "I'll stop the snow and that way no one knows I'm afraid of snow. Stupid snow... stupid Itachi... stupid room full of sheep... stupid bucket... stupid dad... Oh wait, I take the latter back. Wait... I don't have a latter..." While Sasuke contemplated his predicament, he didn't realize someone was sneaking up on him...   
  
"Hee! He's so cute when he thinks!"   
  
~*~*~   
  
Oh~~ first cliffy of the new fic. *cackles* Guess who it is! Can't be that hard to guess...   
  
(To tell you all the truth, I have no clue what I'm babbling about myself. I don't even know... I don't think the person knows either)   
  
Eh hehe... just so you know, I have absolutely nothing against Gai. He's one of my favourite characters actually. Ah, and an apology goes to Sasuke OOC-ness ^^;; It just so suits this fic though... I tried not to xD Umm... I think that about sums it all up. 


	2. Ino and the Fire Department

Oo;; Its being UPDATED!! DUN DUN DUUUNNN!!!   
  
**Disclaimer:** D: Must I say it again?!

* * *

**Chapter Two: Ino and the fire department.**

* * *

Sasuke turned in a dramatic way and gasped dramatically.   
  
"GASP!! I, Uchiha Sasuke of the dead and now unimportant Uchiha clan that I'm resurrecting anyways, am hearing things!" Sasuke said in one quick breath.   
  
"HOLY CRAP!! I MADE HIM THINK HE'S CRAZY!!!" screamed the person! This person also happened to be... some random village girl who wasn't even a ninja!   
  
"Oh, its just you random village girl who's not even a ninja," Sasuke pointed out mostly to himself. She slapped her hands onto her face in a very Lee-like fashion.   
  
"I've been spotted! Oh dear!" she shrieked, also in a Lee-like fashion. "And it's Rvgwnan!! And don't you forget it!" with that she ran off.   
  
"God, I forgot how stupid Rvgwnan was," Sasuke shook his head unhappily and continued... whatever it was he was doing before... Oh yeah, contemplating his predicament! While he was doing so, Sakura wandered into the clearing.   
  
"Hey Sasuke-kun! Can I kill you?" she asked sweetly.   
  
"Nan--? Oh, its just you Ino," Sasuke waved his hand. Ino dropped her genjutsu and snapped her fingers unhappily.   
  
"Oh snap! I can't believe my bad luck!" Ino sobbed. Then she got over herself (by tripping and somersaulting to Sasuke feet) and stared up at Sasuke. "Whatchya thinking about?!" she asked like a 5-year-old brat... or a 7-year-old Sasuke asking his brother to train him... _curses him_...   
  
"I'm thinking about how I'm going to get it to stop snowing," Sasuke had a sudden case of mouth diarrhea.   
  
"Oh, why is that?" Ino asked, still like a child. Wouldn't that be an adorable scene?   
  
"Because after an unfortunate accident involving a bucket, my dad, my evil older brother, and a room full of sheep, I became afraid of snow," Sasuke babbled, not paying attention that he was about to start an hour long rant much like Neji's about the unfairness of his life.   
  
"SERIOUS?!" Ino cried.   
  
"About what?" Sasuke said, totally bewildered.   
  
"About being afraid of snow... and having an evil older brother," Ino added as an after thought.   
  
"Yes and yes," Sasuke said. Doesn't this boy stop to think? And he used to be such a nice boy...   
  
"Is your older brother hotter than you?" Ino asked, with sparkles much like Tomoyo's from CCS. The image of insanity...   
  
"I wouldn't know!" Sasuke just as well shouted. "_I'm not incestuous!!_"   
  
"I never said you were," Ino blinked.   
  
"You implied it!"   
  
"No, _you_ implied it! I just asked if he was hot!"   
  
"But I--! URG!! This is why I hate you," Sasuke pouted.   
  
"AWW!! No pouting! Turn that frown upside down!" and so Ino made him... by poking her fingers into the sides of his mouth and pushing them up. Sasuke died... on the spot.   
  
"Anyways, how shall we stop the snow?" Ino asked going into a thinking pose.   
  
"We?" Sasuke asked, as though he hadn't just died on the spot.   
  
"Yeah, we!" Ino grinned cheekily. "I'll help you!" Sasuke went into his own thinking pose.   
  
"Ano... I could use some help," Sasuke said in a very un-Sasuke-like fashion.   
  
"Honto?!" Ino looked hopeful.   
  
"No," Sasuke said regaining his composure. Then he pushed Ino over. "Fine."   
  
"YAY!!" Ino cheered, jumping up again. "So, Aibou, where do we start?!"   
  
"I dunno... I'm just here to look cool," Sasuke blinked. Ino fell over.   
  
"Yeesh... what do you have so far?!"   
  
"Fire extinguisher," Sasuke said.   
  
"Hey, it might work..." Ino shrugged. "TO THE FIRE DEPARTMENT!!" They both pointed in a random direction... both pointing opposite ways.   
  
"Wait a sec..." Sasuke said, staring at Ino. "KONOHA HAS A FIRE DEPARTMENT?!"   
  
"Well... no... But now there is!" Ino threw back her head and laughed ditzily. Sasuke fell off his rock.   
  
"Oh well, at least there's one now," Sasuke grinned like a moron... LIKE NARUTO!! LIKE KENSHIN ON CRACK!!! . . . but that's another story...

* * *

Seriously, it's another story!! Ah, and if you're worried about Rvgwnan, don't. She'll be fine, and won't be back again. Sorry about the lack of updating... ;; I was working on my other story... and I hit a writers block... I think I'm losing my touch on this story. So if after I finish it, it's completely horrible, I have another story planned >P Because I know we all love Zabuza and Haku! (: So yeah... I'll update sooner... promise y'all that   
  
**Gatogirl1**- ;; Best not to wonder about the bunny thing, I just enjoy calling people animals... Mua haha, personally I think Melodramtic!Sasuke is pretty stupid oo there will be more of that though...   
  
**-taru**- Thanks!   
  
**Pyro Dragon 117**- >D It was my plan to let you're imaginations discover how this happened on your own. The incident that happened but never shown. Oo;; I'm messed in the head >.>   
  
**Yami saru chan**- Thanks for the review! 


	3. Ino's Watch Problem

**DUN DUN DUN!!!** The exciting next chapter!!   
  
Not really no.   
  
**Disclaimer**: I don't own these characters. I just enjoy making them look stupid.

**--**

**SSP: Ino's Clock Problem**

--

Ino and Sasuke arrived at Ichiruka ramen.   
  
"This is the Fire Department?" Sasuke glared at Ino evilly. Ino sniffled dramatically.   
  
"Well no, the ninja's are the fire department," Ino sniffled again. This of course was very fake and nobody is quite sure why's she's sniffling.   
  
"Ino, why are you sniffling?" Sasuke asked.   
  
"Elementary my dear aibou! Because I'm allergic to ants!" Ino stated happily. Sasuke grinned like a complete fool again.   
  
"Oh! That's cool!" Sasuke said.   
  
"Can we have cheese before we try and stop the snow?" Ino asked. Sasuke gave a compulsive twitch. "Etto? Ano... Nan desu ka...?" Ino blinked like a five year old wondering why the sky is blue.   
  
"At the mere mention of the C word, I twitch compulsively," Sasuke told her.   
  
"Why's that?"   
  
"Because I'm deathly allergic to it! We found that out when my evil older brother stuffed some up my nose," Sasuke explained.   
  
"Oh... well... how are you alive then?" Sakura asked... even though... she wasn't there...   
  
"Oh simple, I... well... I... He... umm... doctors... OH SHUT UP!!! IT'S MY LOGIC AND IT BLOODY WELL WORKS!!" Sasuke pouted like a moron. Can you tell he does a lot of things like a moron?   
  
"Sasuke-kun, it's you're logic! Why wouldn't it work?! You're the great Sasuke-kun!" Ino said exasperatedly. This cheered Sasuke instantly. Then he realized how stupid he's been. Poor diluted Uchiha-bunny!   
  
"You're right Ino," Sasuke said, in his usual cold-hearted voice.   
  
"That's my angst-muffin! Alright, so what were we doing?" Ino asked. Sasuke blinked and a frown graced his face.   
  
"We were..." Ino nodded eagerly. "I have no clue!" Sasuke admitted. Ino face faulted and groaned.   
  
"CRAP!! What time is it?!" Ino shrieked.   
  
"I wish I knew," Kakashi sighed, causing Ino and Sasuke to jump 10 feet out of their skin... quite literally. "Ewww..." Kakashi pulled a Calvin face and helped the two back into their skins, trying not to puke too much... After all, he had just watched Asuma do the same thing with his eyes... After the two got back into their skin, they bombarded him with questions.   
  
"Where'd you come from?!"   
  
"Do you have a watch?!"   
  
"Why is the sky blue?!"   
  
"Why do you have a scar on your eye!?"   
  
"AH!! TOO MANY QUESTIONS!!" Kakashi cried and ran off. Ino sniffled dramatically and did that whole dramatic thing... you know with the spot light and the turning and the background? Yeah, that.   
  
"Oh dear! What shall I do!? I promised my mother I'd be home at 2! But how shall I know the time if not one has a watch? How ever shall I live? How ever shall I get home?" Ino sighed.   
  
"You need a watch to do all that?" Sasuke asked stupidly. Ino winked and shook her finger at him.   
  
"Nah ah, can't tell you all my secrets," Ino turned to watch some dude lift her background and walk off. "Thanks for the help boys! I really appreciate it!"   
  
"No problem Ino-chan!" the random dudes I threw in said.   
  
"Nah ha! Okay, I gotta go now Sasuke-kun! So talk to ya later and all that stuff, ja ne!!" Ino waved and ran off, leaving our poor defenseless Uchiha-bunny to wonder how to stop the snow... or how to find a fire extinguisher... whichever came to him first.   
--  
Erm... :S there you go people! I wrote another chapter. Although it's a load of nothing n.n! Ano, and sorry about the Kakashi bit. I can't have a humor fic without Kakashi!!   
  
**DANA-** xD I can't believe you actually read it! Lol! I will keep up my ways! See you in school I should suppose!!   
  
**Chinafuu-** I wrote more! Oo Sorry about the big let down of the fire department. TT-TT Oh silly me could think of nothing! Now how shall our Uchiha-bunny get a fire extinguisher?!   
  
**Ktisune-** Fox= grunt, grunt, but you don't learn that until high school. giggles I have to agree with you! He is a crazy-angst-hole in the head-face. Neh, don't worry, I'll keep writing till my fingers turn neon orange TTTT   
  
**AyumuOsakaKasuga-** ;; Thankies!! Dude, I don't think even I wanna know! O.o  
_Thanks for reviewing! HAVE A COOKIE!! _


	4. Sasuke's Being an idiot Senses

There, new chapter... Almost done... just about 10 more chapters...   
  
**Chapter 4: Sasuke's Being an Idiot Senses!**   
  
Our Uchiha runt finally thought up a plan—he would steal some of Sakura's pantyhose and wears them over his head, then he'd go rob the ninja administrative building of their fire extinguishers and BLOW THE SNOW AWAY!! I'm afraid to sound cliché but, it was so crazy _but it might just work!_   
  
It just so happened the pink haired wonder was walking down the street.   
  
In the exact direction Sasuke was going...   
  
... Except behind the trees.   
  
"Sakura..." Sasuke turned to see the pinked haired girl popping out of the tree... upside down. No wonder she was good at that tree climbing thing! "What are you doing?"   
  
"ANYTHING BUT NOT STALKING YOU!!" Sakura flailed, forgetting about charka and stuff and fell... ouch.   
  
"Ouch," Sasuke said. Urg, such a copycat... anyways! "Oh Sakura!" Sasuke clung to Sakura's arm in a strangely dramatic way. Sakura raised her eyebrow at him.   
  
"Sasuke-kun... did Naruto bang you on the head again?" Sakura asked slowly.   
  
"HA! As if that dobe could! Heh-heh... such a stupid moron he is... heh-heh I'll eat his children one day..." Sasuke giggled quietly.   
  
"Oh... you must have run into Hobo Bob then," Sakura commented.   
  
"NO!! It's even WORSE!"   
  
And somewhere near Sasuke's house, Bob sneezed.   
  
"THE SNOW IS COMING!! HEAD FOR THE HILLS!! THE SNOW IS COMING!!"   
  
"Dude, whatever you're smoking, give me some!" Sakura said.   
  
"I dunno... this stuff can be really strong..." Sasuke commented.   
  
"Aww..." Sakura pouted. "Anyways, what did you want Sasuke?"   
  
"I was about to ask you to marry me," Sasuke said sarcastically. Some random girls popped out of no where (A.K.A his fan club) and gasped dramatically. "Dude, I was BEING sarcastic!" Sasuke rolled his eyes.   
  
"OH!" The fan club said and went back to their hiding places.   
  
"Aww," says a saddened Sakura.   
  
"What is Kuro smoking?" asks your larynx.   
  
Sasuke rolled his eyes again and slung his arm around Sakura's shoulders. "I have a little... proposition for you Sakura."   
  
"So basically what you're telling me is that your not only allergic to cheese... but your also snow-a-phobic?" Sakura asked as she went through her sock drawer.   
  
"That would be correct," Sasuke nodded sitting on her bed. He was swinging his legs like he was seven.   
  
"And how did _that_ happen?" Sakura asked accidentally chucking a sock at Sasuke forehead. "Whoops... sorry 'bout that."   
  
"Well, it all had to do with a room full of sheep, a bucket, and my dad and...." Sasuke rubbed his forehead. "_Itachi..._"   
  
"Oh, you mean your evil older brother who's hot just like you?" Sakura asked.   
  
"Uh... sure... if you want to look at it that way," Sasuke shrugged.   
  
"So... you want a pair of pantyhose to wear over your head to look like a robber so no one can see you're face.... so you can steal _fire extinguishers_ to blow the snow away with?" Sakura asked.   
  
"That's the plan," Sasuke chirped happily.   
  
"That's one of the craziest things I've ever heard," Sakura stated. "But it just might work! Plus you'll look like an idiot."   
  
Just down the street, Naruto's '_Sasuke Being an Idiot_' Senses tingled.   
  
"SASUKE'S ABOUT TO DO SOMETHING STUPID!!" Naruto paused and looked down the street. "HE'S AT SAKURA'S HOUSE!! CHARGE!!!!" Naruto proceeded to... "Charge"... fingers up beside his head like bull horns... the whole spiel.   
  
"What was that momma?" some random child asked.   
  
"We don't want to know," the child's mother stated... and pulled the child inside for fear of Gai eating it. Oh dear.   
  
Sakura and Sasuke peeked out of Sakura's window as they heard a strange strangled scream that sounded a lot like Naruto screaming 'charge' and running down the street towards Sakura's house to laugh at Sasuke for being an idiot!   
  
"Wow, that just sounded like Naruto running down the street towards my house screaming in a strange strangled scream that sounds like 'charge' to come and laugh at you because you're about to do something stupid, Sasuke-kun!" Sakura commented.   
  
"Nah, its probably just Gaara killing someone," Sasuke told her.   
  
"Ah, that's true. Or making them do the hokey pokey," Sakura stated.   
  
"Or it is actually Naruto running down the street screaming in a strange strangled cry 'charge' towards your house to come and laugh at Sasuke for being an idiot," Naruto said from the window.   
  
"Could be..." Sakura and Sasuke said. Suddenly they twirled around to face Naruto in a very dramatic way. "_Naruto?!_"   
  
****   
  
I think the best part is I that I can imagine Naruto charging down the street like that to the Batman theme. Oo Nobody said I was sane.   
  
**Kitsune**- tosses you a cookie O: You're CONCERNED ABOUT MOI?! I feel so loved!! TT-TT I'll keep writing if you for you! Ah, don't worry, they only turn purple from lack of blood wouldn't wanna attract more pigeons... or worse... ANTS!! shudder OO You mean some people don't answer questions? O: OMGGB! Sue!   
  
**carrot stix**- Dude! Go cheese high fives Lol, I'm glad to see you enjoy the story   
  
**YoungSasuke**- Ah!! X YOU! YOU WRITE FUNNY THINGS!! It's true that purple monkey's can't type without coconuts—but blue banana's can't write without kumquats! Ah, don't worry, you didn't kill him. He'll wake up soon!   
  
**tenshinoreika999**- I'm an off-topic kinda gal ;; Lol, Ino wasn't supposed to be in it originally. Actually, the original story was that Sasuke was by himself and went to visit Tsunade and was frightened by her because she threatened to eat his children, then he was attacked by an ice cube and thought it was going to snow. He was worried the snow would kill him so he went on a quest to stop the snow. That was before I forgot it and began typing this. Also, the girl stalking him in the beginning was supposed to be Sakura, and that's how the two join together to stop the snow. But as you can see the plot changed dramatically, and now you all will NEVER EVER know how Sasuke became afraid of snow!   
  
That about wraps it up until next time... which won't be for awhile. Sorry guys... stuff is happening.   
  
And I don't mean to keep picking on Gai... I just do Oo; 


	5. Ninja Administrative Building

O: Oh me oh my!! It's the next chapter, here's a pie!!   
  
Oo;; erm... yeah... you know the disclaimer.   
  
---   
  
**Chapter 5: The Ninja Administrative Building**   
  
---   
  
"That would be my name my dear teammates," Naruto said lazily.   
  
"What are you doing here?" Sasuke demanded. Sakura sighed. _Oh dear..._   
  
"I'm here to watch you be an idiot," Naruto retorted.   
  
"Oh yeah, like I would be doing anything idiotic. It's SOOO you're job!" Sasuke glared at the blond evilly in an evil Orochimaru way.   
  
"You do stupid things all the time! Like the time you ate so much at Tazuna's you THREW UP and STILL ate more!" Naruto pointed at the raven haired boy. "Ha! What about that HUH?!"   
  
"... You did it too," Sakura pointed out meekly. "Besides," she began before he could say more, "Sasuke needs to find a fire extinguisher so he can... extinguish snow..."   
  
"... That's stupid," Naruto stated bluntly. Sakura sweat dropped, but Sasuke on the other hand.   
  
"WHY SIR!! I have NEVER been more INSULTED IN MY LIFE!!" Sasuke stalked up to Naruto and pulled a black glove out of his pocket and...   
  
Slapped Naruto across the face.   
  
"I challenge you to a duel! ... After I get rid of the snow!" Sasuke added almost as an after thought.   
  
"Why?" Naruto asked uneasily. When Sasuke got a stupid idea, he got really down and well... stupid.   
  
"Because it's a long story," Sasuke snorted. Hehehe... Sasuke snorted...   
  
"Well, we're listening," Naruto said. Sasuke suddenly got this really superior look and well... truth be told... I think he's having mental problems today.   
  
"Okay, I'll tell you but you have to help me get a fire extinguisher after," Sasuke stated loosely. "Well, it all started one spring morning...."   
  
---   
  
"You know Sasuke-kun," Sakura began as they walked down the street towards the Ninja Administrative building, "that's a pretty... weird reason to be afraid of snow."   
  
"I can't help it! I thought the lake had defrosted! After all, my brother _was_ practicing Katon there...." Sasuke glared at the pink haired girl.   
  
"... I think that whole story made no sense. Why would you be afraid of _snow_ because of sheep and a bucket?" Naruto asked.   
  
"... Just shut up! WHY DO YOU ALL MOCK ME?!" Sasuke sobbed into his sleeve. If by his sleeve I mean Sakura's shoulder. Sakura patted him awkwardly on his back.   
  
"Erm... its okay Sasuke-kun, we still love you?" Sakura offered awkwardly. Sasuke stood up straight.   
  
"... Can we forget that happened?" Sasuke asked. Naruto and Sakura shrugged. "Good. Let's keep going." Sasuke marched in front of the two with Sakura's pantyhose in hand.   
  
---   
  
The doors to the Ninja Administrative building slammed open with a loud slam-y sound. In walked an shadowed figure with pantyhose on his head.   
  
"ALRIGHT!! GIVE ME YOUR FIRE EXTINGUISHERS AND NOBODY GETS HURT!" the figure yelled. Nobody in the building noticed. The figure twitched slightly. "Don't any of you care?!" he whined uncharacteristically.   
  
"To tell you the truth Sasuke-chan," Anko replied from behind the desk. She was shuffling some papers while a Jounin stood in front of her looking bored. "You pose no threat to us. If you want some fire extinguishers, you can have them. We don't use 'em anyways."   
  
"How'd you know it was me?!" Sasuke gasped. Kurenai, who was standing beside the bored looking Jounin gave Sasuke a look that plainly said '_the hell are you smoking and why can't I have any?_'   
  
"Oh I don't know Uchiha-san," Kurenai snapped sarcastically. "Maybe it's because PANTYHOSE ARE SEE-THROUGH!?!" Sasuke hid behind Sakura, who had just arrived.   
  
"Sasuke-kun, just pretend its women's intuition and move on," Sakura sighed. Sasuke glared at the red-eyed women in front of Sakura.   
  
"Is she the devil?!" Sasuke asked in an urgent whisper that was really loud.   
  
"I like to think so," Kiba muttered from his seat on the floor beside Kurenai.   
  
"Where do these people keep coming from?" Naruto asked.   
  
"We could ask the same of you," Sakura twitched. _This, is going to be a long day,_ Sakura thought as she grabbed a fire extinguisher and ushered Sasuke and Naruto out of the building.   
  
---   
  
I'm going to write children's book when I'm older...   
  
Anyways, moving on! I would have had more to this chapter... like them actually using the fire extinguisher this chapter... but I was having trouble writing it, plus I have the rest of the next chapter written anyways and they're connected... So yeah, I figured "_I'll just end it here... nobody will notice...._"   
  
**Kitsune**- I ALMOST let you know how it happened! _Almost!_ Ah hahaha, you know I'm evil. I'll keep running from those rabid monkeys if you do.   
  
**Carrot stix**- Lol, thanks! Cheese is the best of the best. It's the roxorz!!   
  
**Blitz-Kun**- OO NOT plot bunnies of extra sugary crack doom!! _GASP!_ I'll update!! I swear!!   
  
**Kashisenshey**- o.o You worry me slightly... Oh well. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you crazy... Mm... Gaara... oO   
  
**BigFatBirdWithNoLegs**- D00d! Seriously?! That picture rocks my socks!! And please don't die... yet... anyways, you know that I know that you know that I know that I want your Zoro poster. :3 Oh yeah baby, Zoro-sempai is cool. Lol, anyways thank you! O.o I have no life, so I'm pretty random in general... which comes out in these fics. >.<


	6. Of Cameos and Uchihabunny death glares

Long time no see!!   
  
**Disclaimer:** I own nothing except the insanity that follows this. However, if I did own any of the characters, I would be quite frightened seeing as I am a girl and not a (age here) year old man. Thank you.   
  
----   
  
**Chapter 6: Of Cameos and Uchiha-bunny death glares.  
  
---   
  
"So... now what?" Naruto asked Sasuke, placing his hands behind his head.   
  
"Obviously we need to go to the highest point and blast the sky with the fire extinguisher!" Sasuke rolled his eyes. "Only an idiot wouldn't know that!"   
  
"... Right, sure Sasuke," Naruto said, humoring the delusional boy. Well, there's a first. So the three began their great journey to the highest point in Konoha: Hokage monument. It was a great battle, them against nature, nature against them. But in the end they... were the winners.   
  
"Wow, it's great to be a ninja and you can just jump up large rocks... Like Hokage monument!" Sakura said brightly. Don't say anything...   
  
"... Okay, we're here... what are we going to do?" Naruto yawned, he was not easily amused by this. Not even Shikamaru would—oh wait, forget I started that simile. Please forgive me...   
  
"Must I explain everything?" Sasuke demanded dramatically. Dude, he is so a preteen drama queen!   
  
"No," Sakura and Naruto chorused. Sasuke glared his _Uchiha-Bunny Death Glare of DOOM ™_   
  
"Ah... of course you do Sasuke-kun!" Sakura said quickly.   
  
"Why'd you change your answer?" Naruto peered at Sakura curiously. Sakura elbowed him.   
  
"Sasuke glaring at you with _that_ glare never means a good thing. Such as being rejected for the 3476593rd time," Sakura explained in a hushed whisper. Which is actually redundant, but whatever.   
  
"... and I care because...?" Naruto moved his hand tell her to go on. Sakura whapped Naruto on the head.   
  
"Don't be stupid!" she crossed her arms indignantly.   
  
"Would you two shut up and help me with this?!" Sasuke whined pathetically. Naruto and Sakura turned to see Sasuke with the fire extinguisher pointed at the sky. He was holding down the button, and it technically should have been working.   
  
But it wasn't.   
  
"WHY ISN'T IT WORKING!?!" Sasuke sobbed.   
  
"Ah, it's because of this weasel!" Sakura said. Wow, is she smart? She plucked a mini weasel from the hole in which the foam comes out. Unfortunately, Sasuke was still holding down the button, and was jet packed off the monument. Naruto snorted.   
  
"Smart one, Sasuck," Naruto smirked, shouting off the side in which Sasuke fell off.   
  
"FUCK YOU NARUTO!!" Sasuke shouted from below. Sakura looked over the monument and winced. That _defiantly_ hurt.   
  
--   
  
A few moments later, Sasuke was back on the monument thinking up a new way to get rid of the snow.   
  
"How... how shall it be done?!" Sasuke asked out loud.   
  
"I have no clue," Sakura sweat dropped.   
  
"How about we make a giant heater and place it in the sky and make sure it rains in stead of snows!" Naruto said as if he were a moronic preppy, stereotypical blond cheerleader. No offense to cheerleaders. Notice how I said stereotypical?   
  
"Now why didn't I think of that...?" Sasuke asked stupidly.   
  
"I was being sarcastic moron," Naruto twitched. "You can't put things on the clouds."   
  
"So says you kid," growled a man with platinum blond hair, and a crazy looking head band, no shirt and funny baggy pants.   
  
"Who are you?" team seven chorused.   
  
"I am Eneru, I AM GOD!!" he shouted, thunder and lightening in the background.   
  
"D00d," Naruto stated. SUDDENLY a girl with short light brown hair, a white tank top, jeans and a red sweater around her waist appeared from thin air and started thwacking Eneru.   
  
"SO THERE YOU ARE!!" she shouted angrily.   
  
"Aw crap, not you again!!" Eneru cried, shielding himself from the girl. "I thought I lost you!!"   
  
"YOU THOUGHT WRONG YOU MORON!!" she continued her tyranny.   
  
"Are you still mad that I hurt that Roronoa Zoro guy?" he asked in a whiney voice.   
  
"Of course, why else would I be chasing you around and trying to kill you?" she asked almost calmly.   
  
"Because you're CRAZEH?" Eneru asked meekly.   
  
"EHHN!!! WRONG!!" A green haired dude suddenly appeared.   
  
"Don't we know you?" Naruto asked.   
  
"Of course not, oh wait yeah. You're the dude that was there when Luffy decided to take the old dudes chair, except the black haired dude was in a tutu," the guy stated.   
  
"Oh, so whats up dude?" Naruto asked, as it a girl wasn't beating on a guy who claimed to be god.   
  
"Eh, trying to get one of my crazy fangirls to stop attacking that dude, you?" he asked.   
  
"Meh, trying to get rid of snow, because he's stupid," Naruto pointed at Sasuke.   
  
"Ah, wow, we both have to deal with stupid people," the two sighed. "You know what? You should take him to _Idiots Anonymous_. It'll help... it helped almost everyone anyways..."   
  
"Who didn't it help?" Naruto asked curiously. The green haired man sighed, and grabbed the back of the girl's shirt.   
  
"Luffy," he stated. "Apparently he's too dense to be helped."   
  
"I feel for you man," Naruto said solemnly,   
  
"Me too... anyways, nice chatting with you, but I should head back to my anime. See you," with that, the green haired man, the girl, and Eneru were out with a poof.   
  
"That was fun," Naruto stated.   
  
"But it doesn't solve my problem," Sasuke fumed.   
  
"Sasuke... have you ever thought it's an irrational fear?" Sakura suggested. Sasuke became all dramatically angry.   
  
"I THINK NOT!!" he shouted, with little fans popping out of his head and... Woo, too much Furuba for me.   
  
"Meep, sorry I asked," Sakura squeaked. For a few minutes they sat in silence.   
  
----   
  
Yep too much Furuba... believe me... WAYY too much...   
  
Sasuck is my special nickname for our favourite avenger (: It's actually a typo... I hadn't actually meant it... but it fits.   
  
Oddly enough, I have finished typing the entire story, and if you guys are kind, I shall be giving you Sasuke's reasons for being afraid of snow!! I have that typed up too. bows I know you all love me nn   
  
Umm... oh yeah!! Did you all like Eneru, Zoro's and my friend Lil-chan's cameo?! Ah haha, Lil-chan is like, one of the most obsessive people I've ever met. huggles Zoro plushie Eneru is such a bastard...   
  
****Randumb 1**- AH HAHAHA!! Oh my good goddess, I saw your name on the review and I was like "xDD NICE PUN!!" Yosh!! Power to the crazy! You wanna know what's crazy though? "CRAZEH" is actually a correct spelling in my Microsoft Word dictionary... but 'conviently' isn't. oO   
  
**Carrot stix**- Yes, cheese makes everything better. Just like cake. But, nutshells make everything cramped neh? AH!! I played Zelda!! I sucked at it!! O: It was amusing how much I sucked. I made my friend twitch.   
  
**Cookie**- OMGGB!! I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU'D NEVER LEAVE ME!! sob sob I'm so sorry!! Please forgive me!! Erm... what is it you're asking for now? I didn't quite catch that...   
  
**Blitz-kun**- nn;; Neh neh, it was the only way I could think to put Sakura in the fic however so, she had to make sure her pantyhose were okay... speaking of which, he never takes them off...   
  
**Kashisenshey**- shakes you WAKE UP!!! DON'T DIE!! NOO!!! Don't worry, Sasuck was actually wearing pantyhose on his head... it'll make a good picture... (:   
  
Now I shall go draw funny things... whooo... I think I need a break... 


	7. Bench Weasel!

O: Look! And update!!   
  
---   
  
**Chapter 7: Bench Weasel!**   
  
---   
  
"I gotta go now Sasuke. Even though technically it doesn't matter when I'm home, I told my house I'd be home at 8," Naruto said randomly. "Ja you two!" and he ran off.   
  
"Yeah, Sasuke-kun. I gotta go now too. Good luck with your err... mission," Sakura waved and ran off.   
  
Sasuke watched Sakura's retreating back, and then headed towards his favourite sitting rock to... you know... sit...   
  
Upon arrival, Sasuke saw that there was a random bench across from his rock.   
  
"How absurd! Wait... that sounded too un-me-like, pfft, who cares?" Sasuke glared at a random squirrel, just to get his point across, after all, he _was_ the great Uchiha-bunny! I mean Uchiha Sasuke... That's when he heard foot steps...   
  
That's right, the Uchiha bunny heard footsteps...   
  
Looking down the street he saw...   
  
Hatake "copy nin" Kakashi.   
  
His sensei.   
  
Kakashi sat down on a bench and crossed his right leg over his left and sat there humming a humless tune. A few minutes later he was joined by Kurenai, who also crossed her right leg over her left. They sat silently until...   
  
"Is it time yet?" she asked idly. Kakashi looked at his wristless watch... I mean watchless wrist.   
  
"Not yet," he stated. Soon after they were joined by Gai.   
  
"Hello my eternal rival, my eternal rivals friend-thing," Gai said happily as he too crossed his right leg over his left.   
  
"Hi Gai," they replied almost monotonous. Sitting in silence again, this time Gai was the first to speak.   
  
"Is it time yet?" he asked Kurenai. She shrugged.   
  
"Is it time yet?" she asked Kakashi. Kakashi again looked at his watch.   
  
"No," he replied.   
  
"No," Kurenai told Gai, who nodded. They were then joined by Asuma, who sat in the same position as the rest.   
  
"Is it time yet?" Asuma asked Gai, lighting a cigarette.   
  
"Is it time yet?" Gai asked Kurenai.   
  
"Is it time yet?" Kurenai asked Kakashi, who looked at his wrist and shook his head.   
  
"No," Kakashi said.   
  
"No," Kurenai repeated to Gai.   
  
"No," Gai said sadly to Asuma. They were then joined by Iruka, who also crossed his right leg over his left. They were all silent then when Iruka asked:   
  
"Is it time yet?"   
  
"Is it time yet?" Asuma asked Gai.   
  
"Is it time yet?" Gai asked Kurenai.   
  
"I don't think so, is it time yet?" Kurenai asked Kakashi, who looked at his wrist.   
  
"What in Gods name is he looking at?!" Sasuke asked himself aloud.   
  
"No," Kakashi told Kurenai.   
  
"No," Kurenai told Gai.   
  
"No," Gai told to Asuma, looking very down cast.   
  
"No go," Asuma told Iruka. They sat idly by until they were joined by—   
  
"What... the... hell... is Zabuza... doing here...?" Sasuke asked himself looking completely confused, and a confused Sasuke is not a happy Sasuke—obviously. "And whats a Zebus anyways?!?!" Zabuza had sat beside Iruka on the bench, with his legs crossed exactly like the rest.   
  
"Hey, is it time yet?" Zabuza yawned.   
  
"Umm... hey, is it time yet?" Iruka asked Asuma.   
  
"Gai, is it time yet?" Asuma asked Gai—obviously.   
  
"Is it time yet?" Gai asked Kurenai, who turned to Kakashi.   
  
"Is it time yet?" she asked almost hopefully. Kakashi looked down at his watchless wrist and gave a big maniacs grin... I think...   
  
"Yes," he said happily.   
  
"Yup!" Kurenai told Gai.   
  
"Now!" Gai told Asuma.   
  
"All clear," Asuma told Iruka.   
  
"Yes," Iruka told Zabuza.   
  
"Finally," Zabuza said. With that, simultaneously they all switched they're legs—left leg crossed over the right. Sasuke fell off his rock.   
  
"What the hell was that?!?" Sasuke demanded. "They _wasted_ ten minutes of _my_ life with THAT?!" Sasuke fumed and stomped off rambling how horrible it was that they DARED to waste _his_, Uchiha Sasuke's life. Phacha! He still had to figure out a way for it to stop snowing!   
  
That's when it hit him.   
  
Well, more of, he hit it. But that's just a technicality. Who needs those?   
  
Anyways, Uchiha Sasuke...   
  
Tripped on a weasel hole.   
  
"Bah! STUPID WEASEL!! YOU ARE NOT GREAT ENOUGH TO DIG A HOLE IN THE PATH THAT I WALK!! YOU ARE MERELY DIRT!" Sasuke shouted at the fleeing weasel. "That's right! FLEE! FLEE FOR YOUR LIFE!!"   
  
"Sasuke-san... what are you doing?" a cheery voice asked.   
  
"Umm... yelling at a weasel?" Sasuke supplied, turning to see the miniature toothpaste wonder! Rock Lee! His name sounds like broccoli, but it's not. Isn't that cool!?   
  
"Oh, okay, continue on! I must continue my 558975254 laps around the village! BYE!" with that Lee ran off. This left Sasuke to curse, what if that broccoli thought he was crazy? Then his reputation would be over! OVER!! And an over reputation does not make a happy Uchiha-bunny.   
  
Now, it's funny because the habits of the Uchiha-bunny change as they get older. Let's go into a flash back of when Uchiha Itachi-bunny was a young one. It'll prove what I mean.   
  
**FLASHBACK!! SHOOMP!!**   
  
A four year old Itachi skipped merrily home. After all, his mom was going to have a baby soon! He hoped it was a guy, and then he could teach him things! And huggle him! And love him! And cuddle with him when they were both afraid. Yep, life would be different after this baby was around.   
  
Then he had someone to train with too. But not train to become a ninja, nah, who wanted that? Itachi wanted to train to be a mascot!   
  
Of course, Itachi would need great stamina for this dream job, after all what if some kids wanted to push him over? He'd have to run in a big costume. But that was the only down side to this job. Yep, he'd be... THE GREATEST MASCOT OF ALL TIME!   
  
"Itachi..." his father called. Itachi skipped to his father.   
  
"Hai 'Tousan?!" Itachi asked excitedly. His father sweat dropped.   
  
"Tomorrow you start at the academy," his father told him. Itachi gasped and fell to his knees.   
  
"NO!!! MY CARE FREE DAYS AS A CHILD WITH DREAMS ARE OVER!!" Itachi said dramatically. His father stepped back from the child. "Wait... what kind of academy?" Itachi asked stopping his inner-outer monologue momentarily.   
  
"Erm... ninja?" his father flinched as Itachi continued to scream. He sighed and walked off. After all, Itachi did the same thing when told he was going to have a younger sibling eight months ago.   
  
--   
  
As you can tell, Itachi-bunny has changed a lot from his care free days as a child with dreams. Of course, none of us really care. But whatever, we still love him. But not Kisame. Eww... Kisame....   
  
---   
  
Sasuke lay in his bed. Maybe he was just being overly paranoid. After all, it was just snow... nothing horrible could happen...   
  
Except... _that_. Or _this_, or maybe even... _that_!   
  
_NO!_ Sasuke shook his head of the horrid thoughts of _that day_. No, not _THAT day, that day_! Silly! Don't get your day's confused!!   
  
Sasuke thought back to the weasel. No, not his brother. He thought about it for a few minutes, then it clicked.   
  
_A HOLE!!_   
  
A gigantic hole!   
  
He would dig a gigantic and HOPEFULLY, _hopefully_ the snow would all fall in and he could.... MELT IT!! Yes! Melt all the snow!! WITH THE FLAME THROWER!! MUA HAHAHAHA!!   
  
But where would he get the flame thrower?! Ah who cared? He was so close to getting rid of snow!!   
  
---   
  
Sasuke had quickly run home and grabbed a shovel and then headed towards the center of the town. What better place to dig a gigantic hole to catch all the snow?   
  
Our Uchiha-bunny had reached the 2 meter line, when Neji and TenTen randomly wandered by.   
  
"Erm, Sasuke...?" TenTen asked, peering down the hole.   
  
"What?!" Sasuke snapped, staring up at TenTen and Neji.   
  
"What the fuck are you doing?" Neji asked bluntly.   
  
"I'm digging a hole to put all the snow in so I can melt it. Why?' Sasuke asked.   
  
"Ah... no reason..." TenTen said. "Have fun!!" she called nervously ushering Neji away.   
  
"What freaks," Sasuke said, rolling his eyes and continuing his work.   
  
--   
  
A bout an hour later, Sasuke was still digging.   
  
"Wow, it's a long way to the center of the earth," he commented to no one in particular.   
  
"Indeed it is, glad you realized that!" said a random voice.   
  
"WAH!!" Sasuke shrieked, echoing around the room. "Who are you?!"   
  
"Who am I? WHO AM I?!" the person who was... randomly there. "I'm someone who has a name that most people wouldn't know until someone told them," Kotetsu stated.   
  
"Erm... right. So random bit character, what do you want?" Sasuke asked casually.   
  
"Ah you know, the usual, power, destruction—OH!! You mean like... I get it. Erm, Tsunade-sama wanted to see you in her office," he stated and disappeared.   
  
"Meh, okay," Sasuke said and walked towards Tsunade's office, ditching his shovel.   
  
---   
  
For those of you who read _Kakashi and the Packing Tape_... Can you guess what's coming??   
  
((_Evil maniacal laughter_))   
  
Ah, and what the teachers were doing was from my Algonquin trip in grade seven. It was so stupid I had to put it in!! I mean, you can't live without seeing all them teachers and the dead guy do something stupid!!   
  
**YO-chan (Yugi-obsessed)**- nn glad I made you laugh!! Ah haha, liked the Idiots Anonymous did you? And yes, that did make _sense_. Maybe even some dollars if your lucky.   
  
**BigFatBirdWithNoLegs**- My thoughts exactly.   
  
**Carrot stix**- Ah, I love One Piece, so of course it was dragged in!! They do, do they? Well, I should suppose I shouldn't knock it before I try it then neh? I'll remember to rent a nutshell to live in next weekend >0  
**Kashisenshey**- Oh dear... please don't die of laughter...   
  
**Kitsune**- You got yourself a deal dudette!! >D loves brownies   
  
**Kyuubi-chan**- YES!! Zoro rocks!! One Piece rocks!! Ah hahaha hides from One Piece haters Furuba fit in because well... you know how when Kyou-kun gets mad, cat ears pop out of his head? Sasuck had fans pop out of his head when he got mad. Why? Because for some strange reason I think that Uchiha means fan. That and the Uchiha's are obsessive with their little fan things... Yeah... snickers Can't think of anything without nose bleeds? Ah, don't worry, soon all shall be revealed... soon... very... Orochimaru laugh here Sasuke doesn't share because... his father didn't share with him.   
  
**Blitz-kun**- What am I smoking? You really wanna know? Well, I'll tell ya, just don't tell Bakura-sama... looks around and whispers _I'm smoking Yugi!!_ ((. . . it makes sense if you look at Yugi's hair the right way...)) 


	8. The chapter I can't think of a title for

O:   
  
--   
  
**Chapter 8: The chapter that I can't think of a title for**   
  
--   
  
Sasuke sat in front of Tsunade, in her office... or room... whatever that thing is. He was quite frightened, for you see Tsunade was sitting her back too him, laughing maniacally and staring out the window.   
  
"Uh... Hokage-sama...?" Sasuke asked. Tsunade choked and fell off her chair.   
  
"Ah! What are _you_ doing here?!?" the old woman asked.   
  
"Erm... sitting? You asked me to come..." Sasuke reminded her. Tsunade nodded.   
  
"I just wanted to tell you," Tsunade suddenly looked very creepy. You know like when a character is trying to scare their siblings by making something up? Yeah, she made that face. Sasuke, being the weirdo he is being younger and less intelligent than she, coward in fear. "_I'm going to eat your children!_" she said in a creepy scratchy voice.   
  
"AH!! NO!! NOT MY CHILDREN!!!" Sasuke screamed, and he ran out of the room. Tsunade laughed maniacally again and suddenly held her head in pain.   
  
"Itai! Where'd this hang-over come from?! Oh wait, I was just asleep... was I laughing maniacally in my sleep again? Oh well..."   
  
_On the other side of the door_   
  
Sasuke breathed heavily. Tsunade almost ate his children! Then it dawned on our young, stupid user of the legendary ninja prowess that I keep mentioning.   
  
"Wait a sec... I don't have children!" Sasuke looked mad. Then he shrugged. "Meh..." He walked towards his hole again.   
  
--   
  
After he arrived he found a bunch of random villagers in the hole.   
  
"What're you guys doing down there?!" he demanded angrily. How _dare_ they fall into his magical snow catching hole!!   
  
"We're sorry Uchiha-sama, we who are unworthy fell pathetically into your nice placed magical snow catching hole," the people chorused.   
  
"Damned straight," Sasuke responded. "Now be so kind as to leave it."   
  
"We can't," said someone.   
  
"And besides, you can't catch all the snow in this hole," someone else pointed out.   
  
"That random person is right!" someone gasped. They all started yelling random things and so, our Uchiha-bunny became confused.   
  
"AHH!!!" he shouted and random home, ditching his shovel, the people, the hole, and all...   
  
--   
  
When Sasuke reached his home, he collapsed in his bed that was, surprisingly convenient at the bottom of the stairs!! He allowed it to bring him to his room, even though it's only somewhat physically impossible.   
  
"Oh well, figure it out in the morning," Sasuke grumbled and rolled over and went to sleep. But not before changing into his pajamas!! Who could forget to do that, I mean that's just silly!! Who would sleep in their clothes from _that_ day... NO!! Not _that day_, the day that has just past. Stupid.   
  
--   
  
Sasuke opened his window. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, the breeze was cold, there was pure white, untouched snow on the ground. Yep, today was going to be a perfect day for revenge. Sasuke walked away from the window going over in his head all the things he could possibly torture Itachi with when it clicked. There was snow.   
  
On the ground.   
  
Near him.   
  
On the ground.   
  
It was snow.   
  
All over.   
  
Snow.   
  
Oh crap.   
  
"ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Sasuke screamed in agony. He could not believe this happened. After all he did! NO! I couldn't end like this!!   
  
But Sasuke had to admit defeat...   
  
At least, after he had one last chance. Sasuke ran into a closet. Literally, with the slamming and the pain too! Anyways, he rummaged there for a bit then pulled out....   
  
A really ugly electric fan. Like, I mean this was _hideous_! It was navy, with the Uchiha symbol on it and—oh... whoops...   
  
Sasuke ran outside, half sky clad, carrying the fan. Standing on his door step he plugged the fan in at the conviently placed plug in the front hall AND TURNED THAT SUCKER ON!!   
  
And it blew...   
  
And blew...   
  
And...   
  
"Erm... Sasuke, what are you doing?" a voice asked timidly.   
  
"Trying to blow the snow away!! What else?" Sasuke asked, slightly peeved.   
  
"It looks like your half sky clad being an idiot about to get hypothermia," Sakura stated, who happened to be the timid voice!! DUN DUN DUNN!!!   
  
"Eh?" Sasuke peered down at himself and realized indeed that his shirt was missing. "Oops..."   
  
"Plus, you can't just blow snow away Sasuke-kun," Sakura stated calmly snatching the fan from his numb hands. Sasuke dropped his head. Not literally this time fools!   
  
"I guess that's it," Sasuke sighed sadly. He had admitted defeat.   
  
"Come on Sasuke," Sakura cooed. "Let's go get you hot chocolate or something," Sakura began steering Sasuke into his house.   
  
"YOU MAY HAVE WON THE BATTLE, BUT YOU HAVEN'T WON THE WAR SNOW!!!" Sasuke shrieked and Sakura sweat droppedly continued to steer Sasuke into his house, hopefully to calm him down.   
  
---   
  
oo And so, the end of _Sasuke's Snow Problem_ come to a close...   
  
**Yugi-Obsessed**- HEY! Leave some for me!! I totally agree with you! Itachi is better than Sasuke!! >D Itachi is hot, Sasuke isn't. That's the way life goes though nn   
  
**Hyourin Kage**- Serious?! Ah, glad to be of service nn   
  
**Kitsune**- Aww ): I'm sorry!! Ah, the leg thing is amusing to watch, especially when the people are trying not to giggle evilly. Oo I'll be wary of those bunnies then, thanks for the warning!!   
  
**Blitz-kun**- >D I do my damnedest sir. And yes, Yugi is some nice shit (:   
  
Sorry Yugi, but it's the truth!!   
  
Although the chapters have finished, I have one last promise to fulfill. Within the next week, I shall be putting up the 'Prologue: Explanation'. MUA HAHAHA!! Finished before the end of summer. I feel so pro!! 


	9. Prelude: Explanation on the Situation

And now, your about to see... _How it all happened_! Only the privileged get to see this, your lucky Sasuke didn't catch me with this... >D I bought it off Itachi for a box of Pocky! :3 So enjoy!   
  
--   
  
**Prelude: Explanation on the Situation**   
  
--   
  
A five year old Sasuke skipped merrily through his house.   
  
"Ah! Sasuke-chan!" his mother called as he passed by a door. Sasuke cocked his head cutely and looked in at his mother.   
  
"Hai?" he asked curiously.   
  
"Your father and brother would like you to meet them on the porch," she said. "They have a surprise for you!"   
  
"Wow! A surprise for me?! I love surprises! And it just so happens I was heading to the porch to find my dear brother now!" Sasuke clapped happily. Golly gee he loved his family. Yep, he didn't need anyone else but them. He continued his trek to the porch.   
  
When he reached there he saw his brother and father meditating.   
  
"Ohm, ohm, ohm, ohm!" his father chanted. Itachi twitched slightly, then turned creepily towards Sasuke.   
  
"Hi Itachi! Why are you trying to scare me again?!" Sasuke asked innocently. Itachi sighed.   
  
"There's just no fooling you Sasuke! You're too smart for me!" Itachi sighed again and ruffled his brother hair. Man he hated this big brother ninja stuff.   
  
"Alright Sasuke," his father said randomly. "We'll give you your surprise now." The two older male Uchiha-bunnies led the younger male Uchiha-bunny to the edge of the porch.   
  
"This is it?" Sasuke asked cluelessly. "The edge of the porch?! I SEE IT EVERYDAY!!" Sasuke gasped.   
  
"Erm... no," his father sweat dropped slightly. "We're going to blindfold you and lead you to your surprise!" Sasuke blinked.   
  
"Is it in some sort of secret location that you don't want me to know about yet?!" Sasuke asked excitedly.   
  
"Sure... you think that," Itachi said uncertainly.   
  
"ANYWAYS!" his father declared loudly handing Itachi the blindfold. "Itachi will lead you to the place when I give the signal! Alright?" he asked.   
  
"Mmkay 'Tousan!!" Sasuke cheered, allowing his older brother to tie the black cloth around his eyes. He heard his father walk off, and he realized how much louder everything was. Maybe it was because it was silent....   
  
"Alright Sasuke," Itachi said finally, taking Sasuke's hand. "Follow me." They walked slowly, Sasuke nearly tripping on the stairs down heading down the porch. Other than that it went smoothly. If smoothly was Sasuke banging into several rocks and _somehow_ getting juice in his hair. Those four year olds, always getting into trouble...   
  
"Ah, we're almost there," Itachi said softly. Sasuke nodded. "Now don't go too much to the left since the lake is there and--" Itachi was cut off by Sasuke letting his hand go and jumping onto the still frozen lake.   
  
"ETTO?! AHHH!!! ITACHI!! HELP ME!!" Sasuke flailed, sliding across the pond.   
  
"Ah fuck, I forgot how to skate..." Itachi sweat dropped. "Sorry Sasuke!! I can't help you!!" Itachi shouted.   
  
"WAH!! AHH!!! OUCH!!" Sasuke blindfold had caught onto a rock, and had violently been ripped from his head. Itachi cringed. That just had to hurt... Sasuke reached the other side and was in a daze.   
  
"I knew I should have taken a different route," Itachi groaned, peering at Sasuke through his left hand. "YOU OKAY SASUKE?!"   
  
"Peachy," Sasuke said dizzily. Sasuke began spinning, unknowingly, and kept walking away from the lake like a drunken sailor.   
  
"You might wanna watch out for that..." Itachi began, but it was too late.   
  
"AHHH!!!" Sasuke had stepped into a very nicely placed bucket and slid down the hill, towards the Uchiha house.   
  
"Bucket..." Itachi sighed.   
  
"What's all the commotion—WHOA!!" Sasuke's father had come to see what was taking them so long. Unfortunately for him, Sasuke and his bucket snowboard had just banged into him, sending him flying into the paper sliding door. Sasuke slid, miraculously up the stairs, and right through the same door his dad had and landed in a daze right beside said father. Itachi came running into the room, puffing and wheezing.   
  
"Are you guys alright?" Itachi asked. Sasuke sat up, only to be sat on by a big puffy white thing.   
  
"AHHH!!! THE SNOW IS ATTACKING!! AHH!!! IT'S COME TO EAT ME!! I KNEW IT WOULD!!" Sasuke flailed, throwing the white thing off and standing up.   
  
"Wait, Sasuke!!" Itachi called as Sasuke bolted through the now almost-non existent door. "It's... just a sheep..."   
  
----   
  
Ah, was it anything like you imagined? I'll admit, it's nothing like I would have imagined it... this strangly wrote itself... I was like ">.  
ANYWAYS!! Enough with the dramatics, one last review response!!   
  
By the way Kitsune... Do I get my brownie? nn   
  
**Jen**- Ah Thankies!!   
  
**Kashisenshey**- OO Not done laughing? Erm... I don't mind Sakura actually n.n;; But... my next fic will include bashing... Of DEAD PEOPLE!!! cackles   
  
**Carrot stix**- AHH!! Thankies!!   
  
**Y-O**- Lol, thanks! BUT!! We need to talk about Atemu and Bakie-kun being drunk... :   
  
**Kitsune**- AH!! You bet he did!! ;) Of course I'm putting up the explanation chapter, its right above ain't it?   
  
**BigFatBirdWithNoLegs**- I was considering leaving it up to the imagination, just because I'm lazy... and mean. Damn you Tayuya and Shika diseases!! But then again, I also thought of giving up in the middle of writing the fic. But since I got to the end, I figured I should just finish it n.n   
  
Seriously, has anyone heard of Mikan no Tsuki? -- 


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